new brooklyn: new photos, new stories

first, andy finally got hazmat gear, so we can clean the cat litter at last...

then i thought i would tell you a little more about my family, since i have to see them from time to time, like it or not (usually like it). my dad, who is normally intensely private, doesn't like other people to touch his things, and thinks the government would tap his phone, spy on his house, or otherwise compromise whatever secrets he has to hide, told me i could have free reign in his attic. whoa. his attic is full of all the treasures (and junk) from about four generations. photos, old toys and games, letters, hospital records... it's pretty sweet. i mentioned to him that i want to make more scrapbook stuff, and would like to at least protect the photos he has, at best copy them all and horde them. AND HE SAID, "take anything you want." maybe he had a stroke, and no one noticed. maybe he misspoke, or aliens briefly took over, or he did some of the drugs. i don't know. but he didn't stop me when, later that trip, i went to target, bought big storage tubs and lots of photo safe, acid and lignin free water resistant boxes. i got through a chunk of stuff, but really, probably have my whole life ahead of me if i think i'm going to organize that attic. i should start with cleaning my own living room, but i think we all know that i won't.

so as i found photos, and of course, not having a scanner or any legitimate (and inexpensive) way to reproduce the photos, i took pictures of the pictures. some came out better than others. i stored the photos well so that when i can afford to scan (or whatever) them all, hopefully they won't have disintegrated.

the findings surprise me, and remind me of how wacky my family really is. these are my mom's parents:

she's alice, and he's "papa" joe. i only knew him when i looked like this:

unfortunately, he was pretty old, and sick by then, and he died a few months after i was born. he was 20 years older than my grandmother, and i always wondered why she would have married a way older man, and how it was that she wound up in america, having grown up in rural france. no one in my family talked about it, which was weird, since you usually couldn't shut them up. they had 11 kids, and all i knew was that they met during WWII, fell in love in the mail, and adored each other, even though my grandfather spoke no french, and initially my grandmother spoke no english.

when i was about 16, my mom mentioned, kind of off hand, that her oldest sister nelly was really a half-sister. WHAT? i had no idea. my mom looked at me, a little surprised, and said, "you never noticed that nelly has brown eyes?"

"uh, no mom. i didn't know you weren't a real member of our family if you had brown eyes. i have brown eyes."

she sighed. "no you don't. you have hazel eyes, like your father's."

she proceded to tell me an amazing story, that i couldn't believe had remained a secret until after my grandmother's death. i'll tell you as best i can remember, but i have no other source that what my mom said, and what i can recall of it. apparently, my grandmother lived in france with her family- mother, father, brother, and twin sister. we think this is a pic of grandma and her mom:

the farm was small, and they had stuff mostly for themselves- vegetables, rabbits, some fruits. my grandmother kept an amazing garden until she got really sick toward the end of her life, so i believe that part. it sounds like things were pretty idyllic. apparently, they had a tractor:

she was in her teens when germany invaded france during WWII, and her town got word that the nazi army was headed for their town next. her father was killed when soldiers caught him rushing to bury valuable statues from the town's church. her brother and mom took care of things, until her mother died of some kind of heart problem, and her brother was sent to a labor camp. she and her twin sister dealt with the farm alone for the duration of the occupation of the village, and one of the only stories my grandmother ever told me about those times was about rationing. she said that chocolate was very rare, and people would go to great lengths to get it. she found soldiers one day taking her bicycle, and she got furious. she yelled at them at said she would tell their officers they were bothering her. it sounds like such brave words, but i suppose if you lost both parents and your brother, it seems like you may as well say anything you can to keep your bike. they offered her chocolate bars to be quiet, then offered her more chocolate in exchange for the bike. instead of shooting her and walking away with the bike, for some reason, the soldiers kept their chocolate, left the bike and went away eventually.

apparently though, the sisters were well supplied in the kitchen, compared to neighboring farms. people wondered where they got sugar and meat, and other things that they couldn't grow themselves. people in the village were sure that my grandmother's sister was up to something, since she could bake anytime she wanted with ingredients that were really rare. it became clear that she had been "friendly" with the occupying soldiers when she hung herself after finding out she was pregnant, knowing that women in the town would shave her head, a sign of shame, to mark her as a conspirator if they found out. luckily for my grandmother, it was almost d-day, and almost time for allied forces to kick the occupying soldiers out. here's where the story gets interesting. the people in the town, mostly women and children, welcomed the new soldiers with open arms. more than a few guys came home with "war brides," foreign women they met while stationed overseas. my grandmother was not one of those brides. the soldier she met wound up being a real sleeze, and left her alone in france, pregnant, and with no family.

when the soldier got home to the states, he bragged to his older brothers that he "knocked up some silly french bitch," and thought the whole thing was pretty funny. one of his older brothers, Joe, was horrified with his behavior, and told him he should take some responsibility. when he refused, the mail got involved. my grandfather, Joe, started sending letters to alice in france, with whatever money he could manage, to try and help support her and his niece, who he had never met. she always wrote back, thanking him, telling him it wasn't necessary, that things were fine, that she did fine on her own. after two years of that kind of thing (and perhaps more- i can't imagine the next part with only having said that much), Joe wrote in english (to be translated by someone she knew), that he wanted to come get her, and bring her to the US, where she could raise her child with him, and be more comfortable. He sailed to france, picked up alice and nelly, they had 10 more kids together (all of whom had Joe's characteristic blue eyes), and lived happily ever after. Like this:
at my mom's wedding

grandma with one of my cousins

here's a couple of their crazy kids:
my mom, martha, the youngest of 7 girls (three boys are younger than her!)

typical crowded family gathering- the first lady sitting on the left is my aunt lillian, the third person is uncle lee. between them is lee's wife, terry (interesting story for another time)

Lee was born 10 months after my mother. when grandma delivered my mom, she went for her six week check up, and was 4 weeks pregnant. those are the blue eyes they all have.

my brother has them too.

lucy looks the most like my mom. sometimes being around her is tough, because she does look so much like her. luckily, she's really nice, and much more normal than some of the others, so it works out ok. she's one of the only ones that stays in touch with me. she also kisses her husband (of like 30 years) in public, which embarasses their kids, but which i think is AWESOME. they hold hands.

nelly is the oldest, next come a set of twins, joe, and joyce (in the photo)

Bob, the next-to-youngest, with his son robert, and grandma when she was pretty old. such a sad thing that i didn't ask her more about her life!

maybe the only photo i have of joann, who died a little before i was born. tracy (above in the wedding dress) was the first girl born after she died, so she's tracy joann, and i was born next, so melissa marie (joann's middle name)